Recently in Ouchie Category
To steal a racist joke from this clip's PoeTV comment thread: Avaranche.
* Two young neo-nazi skinheads from Tennessee planned to go on a
shooting spree that would begin with mowing down black students at a
predominantly black high school and culminate with an attempt on
Obama's life. Federal agents foiled their plot. (via TPM)* High School Musical 3 pulled in 42 million dollars over the weekend. After Beverly Hills Chihuaha's smash success, it looks like our dim hope that a bear market might produce a reaction against glossy product and for hardhitting social-realist indie dramadies was entirely unfounded. (EW)
* Radar magazine and Radaronline have both folded. This is the third but probably the last time for Radar. (Jossip)
* According to Gawker, a recent Drudge headline suggests that the Wall Street Journal might be preparing to endorse Barack Obama for President.
* Jennifer Hudson's mother and her brother were found murdered on Friday; the body of her 7-year-old nephew was discovered early on Monday at a separate location. (ChicagoTribune)
* An 8 year old boy fatally shot himself in the head at the Machine Gun Shoot and Firearms Expo in Westfield, Mass. He was being overseen by both his father and an instructor when, as directed, he aimed and fired the Uzi at a pumpkin. The recoil sent the front of the gun flying backward where it continued to discharge the round into his head. (AP)
* Spectacularly spooky Long Arm Squid caught on tape on an oil rig video camera at 8000 ft. With its tentacles dangling straight down below its trunk it looks oddly arachnoid. (PoeTV)
* Oprah had the Real Housewives of Orange County on the show to give them a "make under," i.e. turn them from total cockslurping whores into slightly less obvious-looking hog wranglers. Unfortunately, the looks didn't take; according to unrepentant trotsch Vicky they would never actually wear these new, relatively tasteful looks back in Cali. (via Jezebel)
* In less terrifying news, Republican Senator and Cantankerous Shitheel Ted Stevens has been convicted of all corruption charges filed against him, improving the Democrats' odds of capturing a full 60-seat majority on November 4th.
According to the bio from his new multimedia cookbook, The Testicle Cookbook: Cooking With Balls, Ljubomir Erovic has been cooking testicles for over 20 years. He is also the founder of the World Testicle and Aphrodisiac Cooking Championship, held annually in his home country, Serbia, and "when not cooking or eating testicles, or helping others to do so, he now runs a company involved in the maintenance of medical and dental equipment."
In addition to providing some history on the eating of testicles and some helpful testicular preparation tips, his cookbook features such appetizing-sounding recipes as "Barbecued Testicles and Giblets," "Simple-Style Calf Testicles," "Heart Shaped Turkey Testicles," and my personal favorite, "Battered Testicles."
In addition to providing some history on the eating of testicles and some helpful testicular preparation tips, his cookbook features such appetizing-sounding recipes as "Barbecued Testicles and Giblets," "Simple-Style Calf Testicles," "Heart Shaped Turkey Testicles," and my personal favorite, "Battered Testicles."
Continue reading The Testicles Cookbook: Cooking With Balls.
You know that friend you have who is always winding up being a total whore by accident? You know, the kind of friend who is always calling you the morning after some totally foolish sex jam that he just doesn't know how he got himself into? "I just wanted to play Scrabble! I don't know what happened!"
I'm sure you know the friend I am talking about. (If you don't, the friend is you.)
Michael Lucid's Riley Comix is a feybulously REPULSIVE online comic about one such hapless slut-- the kind we all know and love. It stars a supposed "twink" named Riley -- who appears to be between the ages of 50 and 60 and in poor health -- and his nemesis, the truly nefarious (and similarly desiccated) Patrique, who's constantly trying for indeterminate reasons to trick Riley into having anal buttsex with a monstercocked musclebear named Beercan.
Riley, being the hothouse flower type, never MEANS to end up with a dick up his butt, but somehow... OOPSIES! I'm sure you know how it goes: You're just going for a little spin down the waterslide and suddenly: DICK IN BUTT!
Listen, although THE ADVENTURES OF RILEY is to me very hilarious, this comic is actually SO FUCKING DISGUSTING that I am not certain I can post a sample page on this here Feyfriends. There is just something about the emaciated LEERING faces and throbbing boners that just makes my stomach turn. Trust me, you don't want to see it. Really I promise you, you will vomit.
But if you're curious to see how the story started above continues into the realm of the EXTREMELY NSFW, click below!
I'm sure you know the friend I am talking about. (If you don't, the friend is you.)
Michael Lucid's Riley Comix is a feybulously REPULSIVE online comic about one such hapless slut-- the kind we all know and love. It stars a supposed "twink" named Riley -- who appears to be between the ages of 50 and 60 and in poor health -- and his nemesis, the truly nefarious (and similarly desiccated) Patrique, who's constantly trying for indeterminate reasons to trick Riley into having anal buttsex with a monstercocked musclebear named Beercan.
Riley, being the hothouse flower type, never MEANS to end up with a dick up his butt, but somehow... OOPSIES! I'm sure you know how it goes: You're just going for a little spin down the waterslide and suddenly: DICK IN BUTT!
Listen, although THE ADVENTURES OF RILEY is to me very hilarious, this comic is actually SO FUCKING DISGUSTING that I am not certain I can post a sample page on this here Feyfriends. There is just something about the emaciated LEERING faces and throbbing boners that just makes my stomach turn. Trust me, you don't want to see it. Really I promise you, you will vomit.
But if you're curious to see how the story started above continues into the realm of the EXTREMELY NSFW, click below!
Continue reading Filthy Comic Alert!.
There's a photo on the always amazing RiotClitShave that I would like to share with the world. It's not porn, but it's still probably best if I post it after the clippy clappy.
Continue reading Strap-On Warrior.
Don't let the load image scare you. It's actually probably SFW...as long as your boss doesn't have some weird hangup about violent, underwear-clad man-on-man goosing.
(via PoeTV)
It WAS brilliant.
Brilliantly written and crafted by the rhetorical genius Matthew Scully--author of Dominion, one of the most humane and persuasive books I've ever read; I wonder how he sleeps at night--and brilliantly delivered by Sarah Palin.
It truly was a dark kind of "Star is Born" moment, where this pert and pretty bitch proved to the doubters (like me) that there is still plenty of glittering slime left in the Rove-Atwater machine, proved that as long as there are Republican interests there will be political actors nasty and ruthless enough to lie through their teeth to the American public to defend them, and that Barack Obama is not just running against tired old McCain this election: he's also running against Georgina W. Bush.
What I particularly enjoyed about her skillful nastiness, and what I haven't seen pointed out, is that she was probably driven to hit the slime out of the park not just to score points against the Democrats but also as a kind of "Fuck You" to John McCain, who no doubt has been hollering in her ear nonstop for the past three days, bellowing about all the unanticipated scandals she's carried with her into the campaign. Did you see that icy, 'Fuck You' kind of hug she gave him when he came out to greet her after her speech? There is no love between those two.
Denigrating Obama's work as a community organizer a night after making "Service" the theme of their convention? Screaming and whining to the press about how they've treated her family, then whoring out her five month old and her pregnant 17 year old as a ridiculous sop to the insane pro-Lifers in the base (how many times did Trig pass hands last night?), and above all else stuffing her speech with rhetorical half-truths and outright lies? Yeesh. My skin crawled as it hasn't since Bush was campaigning in '04.
But I can't deny that Sarah Palin has a sort of bitch-goddess Cruella De Vil kind of power over me. Last night I dreamed of her, endlessly twisting a knife in my spine.
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