My abilities in the witty French-joke headline writing dept. are limited by the fact that I don't speak a word of French besides 'oui'--like most Americans I am both obnoxiously proud and secretly ashamed of this fact--so let's hurry quickly on to the point of this post: two new French safe-sex PSAs from the folks who brought you those terrifying(ly erotic) spider+scorpion sex print ads (NSFW-ish) and Wilfred Brimo's (also NSFW-ish) astonishing, heartbreaking, altogether brilliant "Sugar Baby Love" safe gay-sex psa* and it's only slightly lesser heterosex equivalent.
These new clips are not quite the masterworks that Brimo's videos were--the lady version in particular seems like a kinda of inapt/inept representation of the female sexual experience, about which I have zero firsthand experience but thousands of baseless-but-strongly-held opinions--but they are certainly state-of-the-art CGI raunch. They're kind of like the WALL*E of erotic psas.
NSFW-ish clips after the jump.
* (Which BTW OMG how could I forget to place that video on our supposedly authoritative list of the Top 10 Feyest Videos? It's only my favorite gay internet vid of all time! If I could go in some kind of time machine and live my entire life over again, the first and only change I'd make to my otherwise flawless existence would be to get things right by putting that clip in its rightful place in the number 1 slot on that list. Sorry Samwell.)
The lady version:
The (not fey, alas) boy version:
The (not fey, alas) boy version:
KOMMENTEN!